Have you ever tried to force someone to do something and they wouldn't budge!
Flashback: Sitting in church trying to get your kids to stop talking!
Oh yeah, you've been there, right?
One thing I learned from Love and Logic was using what we call Enforceable Statements. What exactly is an enforceable statement you ask? It is saying exactly what you are going to do in a given situation. It must be human nature for us to tell our kids what they need to do:
clean your room
do your homework
wash your hands
be nice to your brother
eat your dinner
take out the trash
walk the dog
Okay----you get the idea. I'm sure you have many other "commands" going through your head.
The real truth is when we tell our kids these things, we hope they do them.
BUT....have you ever had one of those kids who says, "I don't want to."
OR....you just wait forever for them to do it?
Not giving up any family secrets here....well, maybe just a little.
I will admit that "enforceable statements" is one of my favorite L & L techniques.
This takes a little practice but is very easy to catch on to.
Let's take a look at those examples from above and say them the L & L way:
Clean your room........ I take kids with clean rooms to the park (shopping if they are teens!).
Do your homework......Kids who have their homework done get to play a game.
Wash your hands....Anyone who has washed their hands are welcome at the dinner table.
Be nice to your brother.....I let kids who are nice to each other stay in this room.
Eat your dinner...Kids who clean their plate will get dessert.
Take out the trash....I take kids who have their chores done to the movie.
Walk the dog.....I charge $5 for walking the dog.
I think you are probably getting the idea, right? Take those statements that you usually use and write them down. Then, think of how you can rephrase it with an enforceable statement.
Here is my Parent University video to go along with this skill.
Hope you enjoy!
Let me know if there is a specific topic you would like me to address. I will let you know if I feel I can cover that topic or will find the resources for you.